What You Should Know About Dating Someone With OCD

Dating someone with a chronic mental health condition can be challenging at times, especially when you do not have the right resources.

Looking for ways to support your partner in managing their OCD symptoms? We're here to give you all the information you need to know when dating someone with OCD.

Also read: How to Support Someone With OCD

How can OCD symptoms affect your relationship?

Understanding the symptoms of OCD, or Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder helps in knowing what to expect when dating someone with this mental health condition. The two main characteristic features of OCD are obsessions and compulsions. Beyond this, individuals often also deal with stress and anxiety related to their symptoms, which can affect their personal lives to a great extent. 

Dealing with obsessions and compulsions

Obsessions refer to repetitive, unwanted, and intrusive, thoughts, feelings, or images, that cause distress. In turn, these obsessions lead to compulsive behaviours, known as compulsions, to reduce distress or prevent any negative effects.

For example, you may have the urge to double-check if you’ve locked the doors to your house, but your partner may not feel satisfied even after 10, 15, or even 20 re-checks.

Dealing with such behaviours, especially if you do not understand why they are happening, can be exhausting for you and your partner. 

Additional stress and anxiety

Besides stress and anxiety caused by the symptoms of this condition, worrying about how it affects your relationship may also cause your partner additional stress. Past negative experiences can lead to anxiety, especially if they had partners who were not compassionate about their condition. Sometimes, these feelings may lead to excessive reassurance-seeking, where your partner may ask you repeatedly if you are still happy with them.

Difficult sexual relationship

There are several subtypes of OCD, one being compulsions related to hygiene or avoiding contamination. Hence, having a sexual relationship with your partner can be challenging. In addition, if your partner is on medication for their chronic mental health condition, their libido may also be affected. 

Overwhelmed by daily activities

Participating in everyday tasks or chores may not be easy for your partner. The fear of certain chores triggering their symptoms may keep them from taking on simple tasks, such as taking a trip to the grocery. Often, this can lead to you taking on additional chores, which may lead to anger or frustration.

Also read: What Are The Four Types Of OCD?

Supporting Your Partner with their OCD Symptoms

With online therapy and treatment from a mental health professional, managing symptoms of OCD is easier. However, your partner will also need support and compassion from you to deal with additional symptoms. 

Learning more about their condition helps you understand what they may be going through. Understanding the different types of OCD, how your partner feels, and how you can help them, helps you build a healthier relationship. 

Showing trustworthiness

Often, individuals with OCD may feel embarrassed or fearful of their partners' reactions to their symptoms. They may behave secretively or try to hide their symptoms and their side effects from those around them. Hence, you must show them that they can trust you and that you will continue to care for them.

When discussing their symptoms, you must show compassion and empathy, by acknowledging the challenging aspects of their condition.

Understand when they want privacy

OCD is a stigmatised condition. Hence, while they may feel comfortable talking to you about their symptoms, they may not want to discuss it with other friends or family. It's crucial to respect their privacy and not disclose their struggles to anyone else. 

However, if your partner is comfortable talking about their OCD, you can try to start conversations that can help others learn more about this condition. 

Be open and honest

Relationships can be challenging no matter the circumstances. But, when your partner has a chronic condition, dealing with the symptoms can get overwhelming. While you may want to support your partner as much as possible, it is important to be honest about your feelings. 

If you feel frustrated or overwhelmed, be open with your partner and help them understand your feelings. Good communication is key to a healthy relationship and helps keep frustration at bay.

Also read: When Should OCD Symptoms Not Be Ignored?

Remember, managing symptoms of OCD is easier with a scientific treatment plan, it has no cure. Symptoms can affect every part of an individual's life, including their relationship. Hence, it is crucial that you prepare for the ups and downs and stay empathetic.

Your support and care boost your partner's confidence and help them seek the treatment they need. 

Sources:

1. ICD-10 Version:2019. (n.d.). https://icd.who.int/browse10/2019/en
2. Advice for Dating Someone With OCD. (2022, June 20). Verywell Mind. https://www.verywellmind.com/dating-someone-with-ocd-2510560
3. Staff, N. (2021, May 4). Here’s How OCD Affects Your Relationships Before, During, and After Treatment. NOCD. https://www.treatmyocd.com/blog/ocd-relationships-before-during-after-erp-therapy
4. United Brain Association. (2022, June 30). The Impact of OCD on Relationships. https://unitedbrainassociation.org/2019/07/24/the-impact-of-ocd-on-relationships/