Passive Aggressive Behaviour in the Workplace - What is it?

If you were asked to think about anger, what are the images that would pop up in your mind? Anger is often considered to be consisting of obvious and direct aggressive behaviour - screaming, shouting, or even throwing things around.

But there are other ways in which anger can be expressed. For instance, you may act on your feelings of anger by becoming passive aggressive. Passive aggressive behaviour refers to behaviour through which you express anger, but in an indirect or subtle manner.  

A passive aggressive person may actually seem polite, friendly and caring, but they intend to cause harm. This makes it difficult for you to recognise such behaviour and address it.

What does such behaviour look like at work? 

Putting others down: If a passive aggressive person has an issue with someone, they might go directly to their boss about it without first approaching the person for clarification. As a result, the other person is viewed as not performing well on the job. 

Avoiding face-to-face confrontation: Instead of having an open conversation, passive aggressive individuals avoid confrontation. This way, the other person doesn’t have a chance to respond immediately. They may also ignore any notes or emails they receive in return. 

Degrading a person in public: A passive aggressive individual They might roll their eyes when their target is making a presentation, or shake their head when the target speaks or makes a mistake. They may also make insulting and patronising comments about the target with a smile.

In all these instances, the passive aggressive individual does not directly express their anger with you. In fact, they may appear to be very different to your face - perhaps even showing care for you. When someone is passive aggressive with you, your performance and your relationships with others at work might get seriously affected.  

Passive aggressive behaviour is unhealthy but extremely common. In fact, research has shown that such acts are more frequently reported in the workplace than active forms of aggressive behaviour.

This is because passive aggression allows you to express your anger in ways that are not obviously ‘wrong’ or aggressive. When your behaviour is not openly aggressive, you can hide your intentions well and protect others from knowing how you truly feel. Moreover, it’s easier to be passive aggressive than to be assertive - assertiveness is a skill that requires a lot of effort and work. Lastly, such behaviour can make you feel powerful - as such behaviour allows you to affect others without taking any responsibility for such behaviour.

Dealing with Passive Aggressive Behaviour

If someone at work is behaving with you in a way that you think is passive aggressive, you can try the following to address it:

• Find an opportunity to discuss this behaviour with them, or to at least discuss the issue at hand in a face-to-face conversation.
• Control your own irritation or frustration, and deal with the person calmly, even if they try to instigate you.
• If the conflict does not get resolved, try to restrict your interaction with the person to work matters only.
• Try and keep a written record of all conversations and interactions, to prevent deliberate miscommunication.

If nothing else works, and your work continues to get affected, you could try reaching out to your supervisor for guidance on the matter. When you do so, make sure you ask for a resolution instead of simply complaining about the concerned person.