Harmless or Unhealthy? How Self-Deprecation Affects Our Mental Health

Have you ever heard someone say, “I’m such an idiot” or “I’m so clumsy” about themselves in a seemingly light-hearted manner? This is a common form of self-deprecation. It’s a type of humour that involves putting oneself down or making fun of oneself. While it may seem harmless and even endearing, self-deprecation can have a negative impact on your self-esteem and mental health.

Self-deprecation is a form of negative self-talk, which can contribute to feelings of low self-worth and self-doubt. It may seem like a way to deflect attention or to make oneself seem less intimidating, but it can actually have the opposite effect. Research has shown that self-deprecating humour can actually make people perceive you as less competent, less attractive, and less likeable.

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Moreover, it can be a form of emotional defence mechanism. It can be a way to cope with feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and low self-esteem. By making fun of oneself, it can make us feel like we’re in control of our flaws and shortcomings, instead of feeling like a victim of them. However, this kind of defence mechanism can also be a sign of deeper emotional issues, such as depression or anxiety disorders.

Also, self-deprecation can be harmful because it reinforces negative self-beliefs. By constantly putting ourselves down, we are telling ourselves that we are not good enough, smart enough, or capable enough. It can create a self-fulfilling prophecy. If we believe that we are not good enough or capable enough, then we are more likely to underperform or hold ourselves back. This can become a vicious cycle that reinforces our negative self-talk and feelings of low self-esteem. 

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So, how can we break this cycle?

Here are 5 ways to stop self-deprecation and boost your self-esteem

Identify your negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations

One of the best ways to stop self-deprecation is to become aware of your negative self-talk and replace it with positive affirmations. Instead of criticizing yourself with phrases like "I'm such an idiot," try saying, "I made a mistake, but that's okay. I'll do better next time."

Surround yourself with supportive people

It's important to surround yourself with supportive and encouraging people who lift you up and help you see your own worth. By doing so, you can build a more positive self-image and counteract the negative self-talk and feelings of low self-esteem that can come with self-deprecation.

Practise self-care activities that boost your self-esteem

Practising self-care activities that boost your self-esteem can also help you break the cycle of self-deprecation. This can include things like exercising, spending time in nature, trying new things, and taking care of your physical and mental health.

Focus on your strengths and accomplishments

By focusing on your strengths and accomplishments, you can counteract the negative self-talk and feelings of low self-esteem that come with self-deprecation. Take some time to reflect on your achievements, no matter how small they may seem, and celebrate them.

Seek help from a therapist if needed

If you find yourself unable to break out of the cycle of self-deprecation, it might be time to seek help from a therapist. A therapist can equip you with the tools you need to stop self-deprecation and build a stronger, more positive self-image.

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Sources:

"The Psychology of Humor: An Integrative Approach" by Rod A. Martin

"Self-Deprecating Humor: Effects on Perceived Likeability, Social Power, and Perceived Intelligence" by Andrew J. Tracy and Eric R. Bailey

"The impact of self-deprecating humour on perceived social support and well-being" by J. David Giles and Andrew J. Pessin.