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ARTICLE | 5 MINS READ

From Confusion to Clarity: A Guide to Understanding and Dealing with Gaslighting

Published on

16th Jan 2023

Relationships

If you've ever found yourself doubting your own memories, perceptions, or even your own sanity, you may have experienced gaslighting. This form of emotional abuse can be incredibly manipulative and can leave you feeling confused, isolated, and unsure of yourself.

It's important to know that you are not alone and that there are steps you can take to protect yourself from this harmful behaviour. In this article, we will explore what gaslighting is, how to recognize it, and most importantly, how to safeguard yourself against it.

Also read: What To Expect From a Psychiatric Consultation

What is Gaslighting?

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in the victim, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity. The manipulator, or gaslighter, uses various tactics to achieve this, such as denying the truth, manipulating evidence, and attempting to discredit the victim.

This type of abuse is often used in relationships, where the gaslighter may try to control their victim. Gaslighting can also occur in friendships, familial relationships or even at work.

How to Recognize Gaslighting

It can be difficult to recognize gaslighting, as it often occurs gradually and can be subtle. Some common signs to look out for include:

  • Denial of facts or events: The gaslighter may flat-out deny that certain events or conversations took place, even when confronted with evidence to the contrary.

  • Manipulation of evidence: The gaslighter may manipulate or tamper with physical evidence, such as changing the story or altering documents, to make it seem like the victim is mistaken.

  • Attempts to discredit the victim: The gaslighter may try to make the victim seem crazy or unstable in order to discredit their perceptions and experiences.

  • Isolation from support: The gaslighter may try to isolate the victim from friends and family, making them more reliant on the gaslighter and less likely to seek support.

Also read: What Is Secrecy Doing to Your Relationship?

If you are experiencing any of these signs, it's important to take note and seek help.

How to Safeguard Yourself Against Gaslighting

If you suspect you are being gaslighted, it's important to take steps to protect yourself. Here are some tips:

  • Seek support: It's important to have a support system you can turn to for guidance and validation. Don't be afraid to confide in a trusted friend, family member, or professional therapist.

  • Document everything: Keep a record of events, conversations, and any evidence that may be relevant. This can help you clarify your own memories and provide evidence if needed.

  • Set boundaries: It's important to establish clear boundaries with the gaslighter and communicate your needs and expectations. If necessary, consider removing yourself from the situation. 

  • Seek professional help: If the gaslighting is severe or you feel unsafe, it may be necessary to seek professional help from a therapist or counsellor. They can provide you with the tools and support you need to cope with the situation.

Gaslighting is a manipulative form of abuse that can leave a person feeling confused, isolated, and unsure of themself. By recognizing the signs and taking steps to safeguard yourself, you can protect yourself from this harmful behaviour and regain control over your own feelings and experiences. Remember, you are not alone and help is available - talk to a therapist, today.

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